There’s a thing called National Caramel Day. This being America, it is not Halloween, but April 5, an extra day devoted to candy. As a society, we absolutely do not need to celebrate caramel or spend any resources on such absurdity. But Werther’s Originals is having its party in Carmel this year, so hell yes, we are going to celebrate caramel. We will bite on this stunt, but we won’t chew it. We’ll happily line up at the sampling bar and let Soft Creme chunks melt in our mouths. We’ll take a few of those apple-filled hard candies, thank you very much. We’ll drive out of our way, find parking near West Main Street and the Monon, and go along with the Great Caramel Day debate, voting on the correct way to pronounce “caramel,” in Carmel, because we unabashedly love anything butterscotchy and bite-size and free. Go ahead, festoon the town with the company’s logo. Use us. We’ll deal with a pocketful of shiny gold wrappers. We might bring Grandpa. We’ll sneak extra freebies to make this no-bake salted-caramel cheesecake recipe.
We don’t care that Werther’s gave away 1 million treats last year in Times Square but isn’t promising to shower us with the same amount of luscious, rich sweetness made with real butter, fresh cream, and the sensibilities of Alpine confectioners. Just bring us some of that irresistible old-fashioned candy. We will show you the weakness of our commitment to the locavore movement in the face of gratis refined sugar and an appearance by the original Bachelorette, Trista Sutter. Welcome to car-muhl, Werther’s.
