Before AMC rolled out the second half of Mad Men’s seventh season in 2015, the cable channel took a pre-victory lap of sorts. The celebrated series about Madison Avenue ad execs coping with the existential sea changes of the 1960s between Secor laxative campaigns and belts of booze was coming to an end. Naturally, the commemoration took the form of an ad.
The “Mad Men By the Numbers” television spot extolled the virtues of the glamorous gang from firm Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce by aggregating their vices in a flashy montage. Cigarettes puffed: 942. Drinks poured (in the office): 369. Joints smoked: 18. The commercial also noted that Don Draper, the antihero of the series, had run through nine secretaries and slept with 18 women, some of whom were secretaries who both smoked and drank. (Gasp!) Keep in mind, the tally was taken with seven episodes yet to air.
Having recently completed my third viewing of the entire Mad Men catalog (thanks, Netflix), I humbly submit another number to the mix. One: human-sized Dent of Shame in my couch. While watching all 92 episodes will certainly teach you something about life, consuming them twice more will teach you something about a lack of one. And so while I enjoyed the vicarious thrill of watching Don sabotage multiple marriages multiple times, I’m left with a phantom case of cirrhosis and a longing to go in search of my own Old Fashioned.
Thankfully, the antidote is in hand. This month’s cover package (“Get a Nightlife,” p. 54) offers a vibrant look at the delights that await outside the cocoon of (highly addictive) streaming media. From date nights to outings with the kids in tow, managing editor Kelly Kendall and her team of writers have you covered with meals, drinks, and experiences worth leaving the couch for. So, get moving—it’s okay. Trust me, if I’ve learned something in devoting a total of 11.5 days of my life to one television show, it’s that Don’s not going anywhere.
The “Mad Men By the Numbers” television spot extolled the virtues of the glamorous gang from firm Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce by aggregating their vices in a flashy montage. Cigarettes puffed: 942. Drinks poured (in the office): 369. Joints smoked: 18. The commercial also noted that Don Draper, the antihero of the series, had run through nine secretaries and slept with 18 women, some of whom were secretaries who both smoked and drank. (Gasp!) Keep in mind, the tally was taken with seven episodes yet to air.
Having recently completed my third viewing of the entire Mad Men catalog (thanks, Netflix), I humbly submit another number to the mix. One: human-sized Dent of Shame in my couch. While watching all 92 episodes will certainly teach you something about life, consuming them twice more will teach you something about a lack of one. And so while I enjoyed the vicarious thrill of watching Don sabotage multiple marriages multiple times, I’m left with a phantom case of cirrhosis and a longing to go in search of my own Old Fashioned.
Thankfully, the antidote is in hand. This month’s cover package (“Get a Nightlife,” p. 54) offers a vibrant look at the delights that await outside the cocoon of (highly addictive) streaming media. From date nights to outings with the kids in tow, managing editor Kelly Kendall and her team of writers have you covered with meals, drinks, and experiences worth leaving the couch for. So, get moving—it’s okay. Trust me, if I’ve learned something in devoting a total of 11.5 days of my life to one television show, it’s that Don’s not going anywhere.
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