This story is part of
Indianapolis Monthly’s 2016 Indiana Bicentennial coverage, which includes a piece on how to enjoy this year’s festivities. For more on this celebration of the state’s first two centuries, click here.
Indiana’s shape is prime for a full set of whiskers, as Fishers shop Vardagen reminded us with its “The Bearded State” tee. And Hoosier history is replete with luxurious specimens. On your mark, get set, groom!
Abraham Lincoln (b. 1809)
Kentucky-born, Indiana-bred, presidential emancipator. Classic chin curtain.
Edward Sorin (b. 1814)
French priest who founded Notre Dame. Total Dumbledore.
Richard Gatling (b. 1818)
Invented the Gatling machine gun while living in Indy. Kindly Santa Claus.
Schuyler Colfax (b. 1823)
One of five vice presidents from Indiana (to Ulysses S. Grant). Closest to Vardagen’s rendition.
Ambrose Burnside (b. 1824)
Native of Liberty, Indiana; Union general. Pioneered sideburns, which are named after him.
Lew Wallace (b. 1827)
Union general, New Mexico governor, Ben-Hur author. Puts the G.O.A.T. in goatee.
Benjamin Harrison (b. 1833)
Indy politician, Union colonel, 23rd U.S. president. Trimmed and neat.
Edward Eggleston (b. 1837)
Vevay novelist and Methodist minister. Snowy and ship-shape.
George Knox (b. 1841)
Barbershop entrepreneur and owner of the Indianapolis Freeman newspaper. Nice chin puff.
T.C. Steele (b. 1847)
“Hoosier Group” impressionist. Textbook ducktail.
James Alexander Thom (b. 1933)
Popular historical novelist from Gosport. A latter-day Papa Hemingway.
David Letterman (b. 1947)
Beloved late-night TV host, IndyCar owner. Post-retirement scruff game: strong.
Clay Robinson (b. 1975)
Co-founder of Sun King Brewing, helped Indiana’s beer rep flourish. A heady facial foam.
Reggie Wayne (b. 1978)
The Colts’ former Pro Bowl receiver. Ranged from boxed goatee to “training-camp beard.”
Andrew Luck (b. 1989)
Colts franchise QB. Or Civil War reenactor?