IT IS OUR mothers who would most cherish a handwritten letter of admiration and thanks from us. But finding the words can feel overwhelming, so we default to signing a Mother’s Day card printed with sentiments that sort of say what we mean.
Devonna Miltenberger, a creative lettering teacher in Fishers, is out to change that. Subscribers to her Kindness Mail Club receive monthly cards and stickers to encourage connection through handwritten notes. “Putting pen to paper and slowly writing a heartfelt letter not only benefits our relationships but also our state of mind,” observes Miltenberger. “I see it in my classes. It processes emotions better than typing does. By slowing us down, it creates a calm focus.” Multiple studies bear out such anecdotal evidence, including research from Indiana University that found those who write letters of gratitude reported significantly better mental health four to 12 weeks later.
For the many who have grown unaccustomed to both the physical act of writing and paying authentic, thoughtful tribute to their moms, Miltenberger has tips:
Create a first “draft” on your phone with the microphone or notes app by tossing out adjectives that describe Mom. Don’t overthink them.
Pick one and expand on it. For example, say the adjective is “determined.” Does she have a strong work ethic? Loyalty to friends? Patience with big, detailed projects? If it’s “funny,” then maybe her sense of humor defuses tense situations? Is she always the icebreaker at parties?
Work in an inside joke or a memory you’ll never forget that involves only the two of you.
If a full-on letter still feels daunting, pick up a card that’s blank inside. The limited space requires a tight focus to avoid surface-level sentiment, though. You might, for instance, point to an act of kindness and describe how it inspired you to do the same. Or recall a specific time you saw her love for you in action. What sacrifice did you only come to understand as an adult?
At the end of the day, texts disappear, but letters stick around. “What motivates me is the feeling I get when I receive a handwritten note. That, and when my mom displays a card I sent her,” shares Miltenberger. “People really do save them.”
